Does this Count as Procrastination?

Something big happened today, I woke at three a.m. but instead of trying to get back to sleep I decided to look at my phone. Of course, this was not the only thing. I refreshed the news page but nothing had changed. My youngest daughter woke from a nightmare (a sign?), and it took us all a while to get back to sleep. (So far, so not big.) At seven a.m. the alarm on my phone sounded and it turned out we had all woke to a nightmare (I say all because I can’t find anyone who was not with her, and yet…).

The next POTUS is Donald Trump.

How absolutely mad is that!

But I have to stop here. Oul’ Gingerface isn’t having my first blog post too.

Late morning, after the school run, I was at a meeting about the arts when I was asked why I don’t blog. Why don’t I? Hmm… My extra-to-actual-writing thing is the incubator journal, surely. But maybe I don’t blog because I spend so long editing what I write that it always seemed like a chore; maybe my writing is my least spontaneous part, and maybe I have made some pact with myself that I will conceal my opinions/anger/preoccupations inside my fiction.

Be regular and orderly in your life like a bourgeois, so that you may be violent and original in your work. ― Gustave Flaubert

And besides, what if people don’t like what I have to say?

If you start thinking about being likeable you are not going to tell your story honestly, because you are going to be so concerned with not offending, and that’s going to ruin your story, so forget about likeability. ― Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie

And yet I have already been trolled here and the world did not end. (Not every family is a good one and not everyone can have an open comments section, damn it! Now that is annoying!) Then a few weeks ago I read this cracker:

Blogging about yourself is the digital equivalent of public masturbation. ― Original source unknown

At first I thought, yes! I agreed. Maybe. Then I didn’t. I thought, so what! Some people quite like watching others masturbate in public (I’m pretty sure Pornhub has an entire category dedicated to the subject; please approach with caution). But yes, writing is a reciprocal career, you have to support other writers, and I do.

So this is my first blog post, nine days into #NaNoWriMo, when I’m supposed to be writing a book set in the States, on the theme of entitlement, but it’s all got painfully real. So here is where I find myself – blogging like a big blogging blogger. Who knows where this journey us will take us, no doubt deep into the mind of a tightly wound, mild-to-moderately inappropriate, but ultimately very decent, mum-of-four with a penchant for leopard print, PMT-induced ranting and quoting writers, when I quite like the cut of their jib.

Today has reinforced for me that we should not compromise ourselves, our art, what we believe in, nor who we are. I’m aiming to blog once a month, which means that next time I do I will have the first draft of my new novel, and be suitably rattled about something new.

K x

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